Q1. I wish to be "turned" into a vampire - how do I go about this?
> I'm looking for a real vampire sire, no RPG or lifestyler.
I've been looking for years but no luck. It's been my dream for
ever to be a real vampire and be in a clan. I live in Whitehall, PA, in the
U.S.A. Please help me, I'm married, have a son,
no friends. I know being a vampire will give me the fulfilment I desire and
Ii will honor the laws and elders and lord of the clan
I join, but Ii need a lot of help to find one to except into it and embrace
me. Please write me back as soon as you get time.
Yours truly X [Name withheld]
Dear X, Firstly, thanks for your email. You would be surprised
at the number of requests we get along the same lines as yours, and, as usual,
we will try to give you a patient and honest response. It is important for you
to realise that, in essence, the vampire is a fantasy figure who exists only
in the fictional imagination. Out of all the people we have met who claim they
are centuries old, get their nutrition from preying on others, and have achieved
immortality, not one has a shred of evidence to uphold their beliefs. Basically,
such people are kidding themselves. For us, the vampire as a strong, independent
and romantic character is a fantasy and we strive to realise that as a world
within which we can escape. In other words, we can reject what we dislike about
the "real" world by using our imaginations. This can take many forms, i.e. some
do role play, some have a pseudo vampyre/gothic lifestyle, some write or create
artistically, and some are involved in games which involve drinking of blood.
You choose your
own alternative. We do not have either recommendations or condemnations, it
is up to the individual, but we do insist that the choice of others is respected,
and that individuals do not get harmed as a result of our activities.
Your request can, at best, be described as an urge which is naive,
and, at worst, something which is threatening and misguided. We also have had
such letters from agencies trying to trick us into making risqué statements,
as religious extremists or arcane security bodies might do, and these operate
with a high profile in your country. So we are careful in what we say. In your
email you are hinting at something beyond what we have to offer, and you should
take time to think through in some detail what your idea of "the Vampyre" is
in reality. If you genuinely believe they are "real" in the same sense as, say,
Louis and Lestat, in Anne Rice's "Interview with the Vampire" and that people
can be "turned" into vampires, then you do need help, but not the kind we
can give. Basically, using your imagination does not have to mean that you become
totally gullible. As I said, we do get letters
like yours which are provocative spoofs, and, if you don't reply to this one,
we must conclude that we have got your number as well.
sincere best wishes, but keep it real, Vamp-management
no further communication received